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    • Fri Mar 13, 2009

    Does Anyone Know What Networking Really Means Anymore?

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    This is a special guest post as part of Make a Referral Week 2009

    Susan Wilson SolovicBy Susan Wilson Solovic, co-founder of SBTV.com

    Everyone talks about the importance of networking. Every motivational speaker, small business expert, business coach, and self-help/business author: They all at some point include the boilerplate networking banter. It’s become so common that I’m not sure anyone really understands what it means to network anymore. By the way, a bit of trivia for you, the word networking wasn’t recognized as a noun until 1967. (Miriam Webster)

    Of course, online social networks make the definition of the word networking even more nebulous. Sure I use sites such as LinkedIn, Facebook and Twitter, and I happen to like them – a lot! But is communicating via technology really networking? Call me old fashioned, but it’s not what I think of when I think of networking in the purest sense.

    Networking isn’t a race to see how many business cards you can load into your database or how many friends you add to your profile page. Real networking is about real people and real relationships. So let’s get back to the basics and best practices of networking.

    Here are my three rules for effective networking – the old fashioned way.

    Rule One: You must be committed. You aren’t networking if you’re out for instant gratification. An effective network is built upon a solid foundation of relationships that are built over time. A number of years ago I taught a women’s entrepreneurial training course at a community college. As part of the course we discussed networking and their homework assignment was to attend one or two events. When we returned to the subject, a student reported she’d thought networking events were a waste of time. When I asked why she felt that way, she explained that she’d paid to go to several events in her community and she passed out tons of business cards, but she hadn’t gotten any business. Rule number one – don’t expect immediate gratification.

    When you make a new business acquaintance, take time to learn as much about them as possible. Engage them in conversation and ask open-ended questions. Are there common interests you share? Do your children go to the same school? The magic words in my opinion: “Tell me about yourself.”

    Rule Two: Develop a relationship. Stacking business cards on your desk or scanning them into your Outlook doesn’t create a network. Sending your new acquaintance a brochure or sales letter doesn’t develop a relationship. And calling to set an appointment or make a sale is really not going to do the trick either. However, taking time to develop a relationship is what’s going to help you build a solid network. For example, let’s say I meet you at an event and during our conversation you mention you are a dog lover. Guess what, so am I. We have a nice conversation and you tell me you’d like to know more about creating a dog-friendly office environment. So what do I do? I go back to my office and send a “nice to meet you” email, but in addition I include a link to an article with advice for pet-friendly workplaces.

    Rule Three: Give, give, give. The second magic phrase to remember: “How can I help you?” You know the adage, it’s better to give than receive, that applies here. Be willing to put the other person first. Find out how you can help them and follow through. Perhaps, you can make an introduction or suggest a good resource for their business. Become the “go-to” person. Then, when you need assistance or business referrals, you’ll be rewarded abundantly. There is no better asset – personally or professionally – than a strong network.

    Susan Wilson Solovic is the co-founder of SBTV.com, the first television network on the web devoted 100 percent to the small business market and the author of several books, including The Girls’ Guide to Building a Million-Dollar Business.

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    Posted by: John Jantsch on Mar 13, 09 | 5:05 am
    Category: Referral Marketing, make a referral week | Tags: ,

    Comments
    « | Home | »
    • Thanks susan, i agree with you, you have to put the hard work in to networking to see results.

      Too many "opportunists" skim over the hard work and wonder why they get knowwhere!

      relationships in business online are as important as off line, just because there isn't that "face to face" reality online people tend to have an element of "cyber rudeness!"

      Thanks Again Susan

      derek
      Internet Marketing At APD
    • Great post! thanks for sharing.
    • Susan, great post. A lot of people are so engrossed in trying sell, sell, sell, that they forget the power of relationships. By focusing on the relationship first, people not only can increase the potential for strong, sustainable business but will also learn how to better serve their clients. Knowing more about your client, in all aspects, builds loyalty and promotes referrals.

      Thanks for this post!
    • Susan, great post and thoughts on networking! When I go to a networking event I prefer to meet 3 or 4 great people, have a good conversation, and then follow up to learn more about them and their company. It's really all about what I can do for them, how I can help them, who can I connect them to, and the greatest is can I give them a referral!

      Many times I do not receive a sale or referral from this new contact right away but over time as the relationship grows I do. By focusing on them and what I can do for them I receive so much more!
    • Great post Susan. It's alomst like you jumped into my mind and typed what I was thinking.

      I've usually been very successful with networking and Ithink it's because I genuinely enjoy talking with other people about their businesses.

      Being in business can be lonely so I found these networking events a great emotional boost and therefore I really rarely try to sell.

      Networking is about sharing, helping and communicating.

      Business that flows from those natural interactions is a bonus (and usually a big one!)

      Thanks again

      Mike
    • These are really excellent points. Too many people view a networking event as a chance to run around and hand out business cards or flyers to random people, then wonder why they don't get results.

      I try to follow the steps you've outlined here, but I don't always think to send a helpful link as you've suggested. That's a great idea, which will really increase the chance of that person remembering you - thanks!
    • Great article. I think the common thread here can be summed up in one word: relationship. If you want to network effectively, you need top put the same energy into those relationships as you would any other relationship.
    • Susan, excellent points all around. We just started our business and often feel as though we don't have a lot to give other people in the way of referrals (re point #3). We've started sharing our forms, though, which other attorneys have found helpful for their own marketing.

      I wholeheartedly agree with building the referral relationship over time. I try to stay in touch with thank you notes, follow-up phone calls, etc.

      Thanks for the reminders and ideas.
    • Elizabeth, when I started my business, I also felt that I wasn't able to give referrals, but we all know 200+ people - they don't have to be clients or colleagues; just someone who needs something.
    • Great timing for some great reminders about what networking really is about. I am just in the process of finishing an article for my in person Networking Group - Geneva Women in International Trade - on "Why I Hate Networking".

      I have to add that your three rules for effective networking – the old fashioned way are just as valid and necessary for "not in person" networking as in the social networks. Otherwise it is NOT networking.
    • I don't think that networking online is enough. I access so many social networks from my webtop daily and have fun doing it. But, there is something about that face to face meeting that really makes a difference. By networking online, you form your own opinion about a person. I have found out that my "formed opinion" was completely off after I met them in person.

      I love your rules and need to remind myself of them frequently!
    • I agree. Socializing is a commitment. We should not just become a member there to scattered our marketing stuff. It's a place for real socializing and making significant relationships.
    • Susan, I applaud every word you've written! The importance of building relationships is very near and dear to my heart and it really puzzles me when I hear people say that they don't attend networking events because it's a waste of time! What is their goal? Is it to establish contacts with the goal of developing lasting relationships or just to hand out a stack of their cards in exchange for a stack of everyone's card?

      They are usually disappointed when they e-mail or call persons they have cards for that do not respond. But they miss the point that they did not take the time to develop a relationship with even one person. It's called "building" or "developing" - it takes time! Thank you for a great article.
    • I agree that effective networking still needs to take place the old fashioned way. But I think all these new online tools allow that to happen more frequently

      I can go to a conference and know 10-20 people that I started talking with on twitter or something and then can meet them.
    • Greg Paskill
      Networking is unfortunately oversold as a means to land jobs. You had incredible insight when you pointed out to not expect instant gratification from it.

      I myself have never networked to get a job. I really love cold calling people. I do like developing that relationship component that other commenters spoke about. Nevertheless, I've never liked this idea that in order to get a job, I have to wait for somebody else to introduce me. If employers want self-starter, self-motivated types, why delay with a middleman? Why not go direct and show them WHAT I know, not WHO?

      In every position I've landed, I've demonstrated to my employer that you are first dealing with me because of my competence. You're not doing business with me because of special favors to anybody. If you make a decision to go along with me, it's because you as a self-thinking individual reached those productive conclusions, not because you needed someone else to make your decision for you. Delegation is one thing, overrelying on a network instead of yourself is another.
    • I agree that the heart of any network must be real relationships. I look at Social Networks as a way to get to know people before taking the relationships to the next level. Kind of like Speed dating. You get to know enough to find out if getting to know them better is worth it.
      Andrew Brinkworth
      florida marketing
       from Andrian
    • I think people do lose track of the giving mentality. That is the key to growing relationships. When ever i meet someone i really think hard how can impact there lives. Love the article

    • Great article! Bottom line ... don't SELL at a networking event. Build relationships with people. Have your elevator speech ready ONLY if they ask about you. A successful networking event is one where you really get to know some people. Listen intently and make a couple of mental notes. Find their needs, make a friend. People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care.
      Thank you for reminding us about the Rules!
    • I absolutely agree with the contents of the post and because I attend several networking events I often see people racing around promoting what they do without waiting to be asked. The point about not expecting instant gratification is well taken because here again people attribute not receiving immediate business to a networking failure rather than a failure on their part to GIVE first. The receiving will come once relationships are developed. Thanks for the reminders.
    • My friend Patric Delaney says: Be interested, not interesting, your wisdom in a nutshell I think. I also recommend Daniel Goleman's latest book 'Social Intelligence' which explains the neurology of face to face interaction. I could never understand the statement that the words we speak are only 20% of our communication, the rest is body language, now I understand. But the most fascinating potential is combining the two, meeting face to face your virtual friends.
    • Malcom
      I agree with you alot of sites try to out do each other, and run each other out of bussiness. If you really want a social networking site that does not care about that you should join http://FriendsList.tk
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